If the shoe fits ...

The other day I was irritated with myself. I was irritated with myself because I was not happy with the weight loss program I was "trying on." [I say trying on because I was approaching the "Biggest Loser 30 Day" diet, program .... whatever you wanna' call it - as a "weigh" to lose weight and I was finding it wasn't a good "fit."]

I didn't really realize this is what I was doing when I set out to try it. I figured this was "the" program that would help me finally reach my goal weight once and for all.

Unfortunately - I found this particular program to be too time consuming, too expensive, and too difficult (no offense to the author[s] of the plan).

My first response was to become irritated with myself! I immediately started to tell myself I was just "lazy" - that I was unwilling to take the time or put out the effort required to succeed.

And then! Then I stopped for a second and did something I am trying to do in various situations where I am unsupportive of me: I asked myself what I would tell a good friend who was in my same position.Would I "kick her while she was down?" Would I tell her that she was lazy, a quitter, not motivated enough?

Nope. I wouldn't do that. Instead, I would tell her (or him, I guess) to consider the possibility that maybe this wasn't the right program for them.

I would say, "Don't give up! Don't label yourself a quitter or a sluggard!" "Consider the possibility that you might need to keep looking for a program better suited for your needs." I would ask them to keep looking until they found a better "fit" for their situation, their personality, their lifestyle, their tastes.

What a difference it made to cut myself some slack.

Consider the following analogy:

When I need a new pair of shoes I don't go to a shoe department, pick a pair of shoes off the shelf, try them on, walk around a bit, find them too tight and yet buy them anyway because I tried them on and now I'm obligated. I wouldn't be mad at myself because my foot was the wrong size or I don't have the right taste to accept these shoes. (ha) Who would do that?

I would take a pair of shoes off the shelf (or ask the sales person for the shoes in my size), try them on, stand up, walk around a little bit and test the fit.

If I felt they were too tight, too lose, too ugly, too expensive or if everything "seemed right" but I decided they just weren't the right "fit" for me -- I would say "no thanks" and I'd try on another pair of shoes ... maybe at that shop, maybe at another shop. I'm not "obligated" to buy shoes just because the sales person brought them to me. I'm not obligated to do anything. I'm trying them on. It's okay if I don't like them once they're on "just because." It's my choice!

Why don't we do that with diets? If something is too restrictive, too expensive, too "whatever" - why do we feel obligated to continue? It's okay to move on and leave a program that doesn't work for us behind. We don't owe anybody an explanation - we're not obligated because we signed up, signed on, bought a book, joined a group. Yes, it might be a little costly but seriously - are we not worth finding something that works for us?

I say yes - we are. I am.

Eventually- if we allow ourselves the freedom to keep looking, keep trying things on, if we decide it's not that we have a problem (it's not that we didn't grow our foot long enough or God gave us feet that were too big) .... it's that it's just not the right "shoe" for us! Woo Hoo!

We just freed ourselves TO find the right fit! How liberating is that?!

The key is - keep on "shoe shopping" ... and once you find that "shoe" that fits your "foot" perfectly ...

Never, never give up!

One last thing: I kept first things first and now that my semester is offically over (I got an "A" - woo hoo and yes, I'm smiling!) I can allow myself the joy of ...

Keeping you posted once again ~

'me'